Saturday, August 2, 2014

Womb Zoning

It seems like many people view women as real estate.

Something to be owned, beautified and DEVELOPED. However, some of us are not so keen to put in the guest house.

When a couple gets married, those around them begin the incessant, "When are you having a baaaby?" chants.  I often get the impression that many folks are really saying, "So what are you going to do about that vacant lot there?"

Now, THIS womb is not zoned for reproduction.  It's not an especially accommodating place for a tiny human, due to the unevenness of the terrain, and between the surveyors and architects and contractors that would be required to carry off a successful build, there would scarcely be any funds left for upkeep.

I explain euphemistically my situation, a bit tongue-in-cheek, yes, but sincerely, because I don't feel that I should need to explain.  If it is considered rude to demand of a homeowner an explanation of how he spends his money to enhance his property, shouldn't it then be thought equally uncouth to insist that a woman delineates her plans to you for the future of her uterus?

This is not to say that she can't. MANY women love to show off their projects, from the first breaking of foundation ("Look at the sonogram!") right up until the completion of the structure ("And this is the day we brought him home!").

All I'm saying is that if she chooses NOT to take you on the full tour of her acreage and explain the uses to which it will be put, you shouldn't feel offended.

Go build on your own land.

1 comment:

  1. Ha! A bit tongue-in-cheek, indeed! Clever and well-stated, as always. Also, ideally true.